If you recall, I like stalking and/or fucking with people on AIM. It's been awhile I've played any AIM pranks (much less update my blog), so it was high time I got off my duff and did something about it. Target: my friend Jen, the one who started it all. The following is an actual convo filled with non-sequiturs, spelling errors, and prejudicial undertones. Enjoy!
AZombieAteMyDog: hello! AZombieAteMyDog: how are you? SwtOrchds225: who is this AZombieAteMyDog: geez, that's not a friendly hello. SwtOrchds225: ok.. hi.. SwtOrchds225: who is this SwtOrchds225: haha AZombieAteMyDog: my name is justin. AZombieAteMyDog: i saw your profile on facebook. SwtOrchds225: interesting sn SwtOrchds225: i hope its not true SwtOrchds225: lol SwtOrchds225: you go to uic or something? AZombieAteMyDog: no, but a gypsy ate him. AZombieAteMyDog: sure. SwtOrchds225: i see SwtOrchds225: well let me see your profile AZombieAteMyDog: so what's up? SwtOrchds225: cool AZombieAteMyDog: you're cool? AZombieAteMyDog: cool! SwtOrchds225: haha no i mean your profile SwtOrchds225: nothing's up SwtOrchds225: just chilling out SwtOrchds225: and u? AZombieAteMyDog: in this kind of weather? SwtOrchds225: haha i'm inside AZombieAteMyDog: you should go outside. AZombieAteMyDog: it's nice! SwtOrchds225: i'm lazy SwtOrchds225: hahaha AZombieAteMyDog: so what exactly is a swtorchds? SwtOrchds225: oh... AZombieAteMyDog: sweat orchards? SwtOrchds225: supposed to spell "sweet orchids" SwtOrchds225: cuz those are my fave flowers AZombieAteMyDog: that's horrible spelling! AZombieAteMyDog: you should go back to elementary school! SwtOrchds225: what SwtOrchds225: no.. its spelled right.. i just took out the vowels AZombieAteMyDog: and learn your vowels! SwtOrchds225: AZombieAteMyDog: and the 225? SwtOrchds225: anniversary of me and my bf haha SwtOrchds225: i didn't want it to be another bday AZombieAteMyDog: so do you like to smoke weed? SwtOrchds225: hmm SwtOrchds225: actaully i never have, believe it or not SwtOrchds225: that was random AZombieAteMyDog: good! cuz weed is bad! SwtOrchds225: ok.. thanks dad SwtOrchds225: haa AZombieAteMyDog: alcohol is my anti drug. SwtOrchds225: alcohol is awesome AZombieAteMyDog: but do you know where i can score some shit? SwtOrchds225: sheesh, is that the rea reason you IMed me? SwtOrchds225: real SwtOrchds225: nope.. don' t know SwtOrchds225: sorry AZombieAteMyDog: haha, just kidding. SwtOrchds225: riiiight AZombieAteMyDog: pulling your leg! SwtOrchds225: ;-) SwtOrchds225: uh huh SwtOrchds225: sure SwtOrchds225: haha AZombieAteMyDog: oh man, one time i drank so much.... AZombieAteMyDog: i puked all over a cab! AZombieAteMyDog: and the driver was gonna call the popo! SwtOrchds225: that sucks AZombieAteMyDog: so i ran away into the night. AZombieAteMyDog: without paying! SwtOrchds225: i got pretty drunk this past saturday night at a club SwtOrchds225: it was my 21st SwtOrchds225: oops SwtOrchds225: 22nd SwtOrchds225: haha SwtOrchds225: man i'm old AZombieAteMyDog: you are old! AZombieAteMyDog: old hag! SwtOrchds225: shut up SwtOrchds225: i'm wise AZombieAteMyDog: one time, i got so drunk, i woke up in someone else's bed. AZombieAteMyDog: i was like naked and shit. SwtOrchds225: ew AZombieAteMyDog: so was the other person. SwtOrchds225: thats never good AZombieAteMyDog: the funny thing is, it was a guy's bed! SwtOrchds225: hmm .. was it a guy SwtOrchds225: EW AZombieAteMyDog: and i'm not even gay! AZombieAteMyDog: stranger still, it was my best friend too! SwtOrchds225: ew SwtOrchds225: lol SwtOrchds225: ok well.. i think i hear my mom caling me... SwtOrchds225: from work SwtOrchds225: lol AZombieAteMyDog: have you ever had a homoerotic encounter? SwtOrchds225: uh no AZombieAteMyDog: would you want to try? AZombieAteMyDog: my girlfriend is interested. AZombieAteMyDog: and she's black. AZombieAteMyDog: itchi gitchi ya ya ya ya. mocha choca lalalalala. AZombieAteMyDog: free your lady marlmalade! SwtOrchds225: hmm SwtOrchds225: are you on somethin AZombieAteMyDog: i'm high... AZombieAteMyDog: ...on jesus. AZombieAteMyDog: why? do you know where i can score some primo shit? AZombieAteMyDog: cuz i have this friend who's looking for a good deal. SwtOrchds225: sorry buddy i really don't AZombieAteMyDog: do you like dogs, sweat orchards? SwtOrchds225: yeah AZombieAteMyDog: i like puppies. SwtOrchds225: yeah they cute AZombieAteMyDog: puppies ar emy favorite. AZombieAteMyDog: sometimes i go to the petstore and bang on the windows of puppy kennels. AZombieAteMyDog: they're so adorable! AZombieAteMyDog: ever had a puppy? SwtOrchds225: nopes AZombieAteMyDog: i did once. AZombieAteMyDog: but it got ran over. AZombieAteMyDog: my mom was backing up in the driveway... AZombieAteMyDog: it was horrible! AZombieAteMyDog: i couldn't stop crying for years! AZombieAteMyDog: ever hit an animal, sweat orchards? SwtOrchds225: no AZombieAteMyDog: sometimes, when i get real angry, i hit my girlfriend's cat. AZombieAteMyDog: my daddy used to hit me. AZombieAteMyDog: with a switch. AZombieAteMyDog: and then my daddy drank all the time. AZombieAteMyDog: that's why i drink a lot, especially turpentine. AZombieAteMyDog: and then my daddy died of acute retina failure. SwtOrchds225: i g2g to the bank now... sorry AZombieAteMyDog: awww. AZombieAteMyDog: i like talking to you... AZombieAteMyDog: it makes me feel better. SwtOrchds225 signed off at 5:43:03 PM.
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5:49 PM
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